Planning a Wedding Out of State

In my fourth year of business, I started to notice a trend from my Brides.  Many of them were planning a wedding out of state.  Bless their hearts, right?  Wedding planning is difficult enough when you’re close to the wedding vendors, but add in the extra task of being hours or states away, Brides are on a whole different level.

I asked my Brides who have been planning a wedding out of state a couple questions, and I’m so excited to share the responses with you today!

I asked ten questions that I felt would be most helpful for Brides who are currently in this situation.  Ladies, I know you’re feeling overwhelmed planning a wedding out of state, but my Brides are proof that it all works out in the end.  So here’s their responses to the questions I asked.  I hope you find this extremely helpful!

Did you book the majority of your vendors while you were physically in a different state?

83% reported that they did book the majority of their vendors while they were in a different state.  A lot of the booking happened through phone and email.  TIP: Write down your questions so when you’re on the phone with your vendors, you have questions in front of you, and then you’re able to take notes, as well!

Which Vendor was the Hardest to Book While?

The two top responses to this question was Venue and Caterer.  Pretty obvious right?  One Bride suggested lining your venues for all in one day.  Start with your top three or four choices and schedule consultants with enough time out, and the coordinators at the Venues should be pretty flexible, as long as you’re not picking a Saturday, in June.  Same goes for Catering.  Line them up, and go hungry.  Make sure when you’re emailing you ask all the important questions to make sure that they’re the right fit for your wedding day vision.  This obviously requires you to take some time to make the trip back home and have a very busy weekend ahead.  Maybe you’ll want to consider taking a day or two off work just to relax from planning a wedding out of state.

Did You Have Help from Family?

With an over whelming response, my Brides all answered yes, that they did have help from family while planning a wedding out of state.  Most of my Brides mentioned that their Mom’s did some researching.  Mom’s were put in charge of filtering out vendors that weren’t in budget, didn’t have the date available, or simply put in charge of the vendors that the Bride cared least about.  Nine chance out of ten, your mom (or maybe a sister) knows you best, so if you know you can rely on their judgement, ask for their help!  This isn’t a one man show, especially since you’re planning a wedding from out of state!  Ask for that help and embrace it!

How Often Did You Make a Trip Back While Planning a Wedding Out of State?

Most brides found that traveling home at least three times was helpful.  I did have one Bride who came home for a couple weeks the summer before her wedding to book all her vendors and was able to finalize the rest of the details via phone or email.  This is also my same Bride who planned her wedding from TEXAS!  She takes the cake for the furthest away while planning a wedding out of state! Most of my Brides were back in town less than a week before the Wedding, so this leaves little to no time for last minute adjustments with Vendors.  Keep this in mind when you’re planning out your schedule the week before the wedding.  Make sure that you nail down all the important details with your vendors a month before the wedding!

What was the Most Stressful Part of Planning a Wedding out of State?

Here are the direct responses from some of my Brides:

• Making sure everything and everyone were where they were supposed to be. There were only 3 of us in the wedding party along with only some of my family that were familiar with the area. So making sure people were able to find their way around was important. Also, making sure I had everything. I’m not sure when but I started bringing things with me and leaving them at my parent’s house so it was at least in Ohio.
• It was really hard having to wait until I got ‘home’ to do a lot of preparations! I really like to do things ahead of time, but it was near-impossible to do some things in Texas and transport them to Ohio.
• Not being able to meet face to face with vendors. BUT it is amazing how accessible vendors are from the phone and willing to work with you
• Not meeting vendors in person and picking the wrong ones and not finding out until the day of!
• Vendors not undestanding that I couldn’t just stop by/that most meetings had to be on the weekend

What Advice do You Have for Other Brides Who Will Be Planning Their Wedding out of State?

Direct responses again from my Brides

• If you can skype and meet who you want to hire! Always trust your gut and have a backup plan as well.
• Try not to stress out! Everything will get done and everyone is so willing to help, take advantage of it!
• It’s definitely worth it if that’s where your heart is set. I can’t imagine getting married anywhere else. Luckily, I had plenty of time to plan (we gave ourselves almost a year in a half) but it is still totally doable in less time, you just have to be resourceful. Ask friends and family for suggestions and google and customer reviews are your best friend. Also, be willing to call and ask questions. My rule for vendors I wasn’t sure about ( I knew who I wanted for my flowers, photographer and reception venue) was to find at least 3 vendors and to call and ask all of my questions to each company.
• Make a checklist and just keep checking things off the list. I have decided on a day to look over the checklist every week. Life gets busy and I have found that this reminds me of deadlines I need to follow.
• It’s easier than you might think! I LIVED on the wedding planning websites, and read LOTS of reviews before contacting vendors via email. If they didn’t email me back quickly (within 1-2 days), I didn’t waste my time on them. I knew I needed to find vendors that would be prompt and would work with the long distance factor. I also had to ‘let go’ of some of my controlling tendencies, and trust that things would fall into place. My mom was GREAT about getting in touch with some of the local vendors to sort out small details that were easier to do in person versus over the phone/via email. On trips home, leave as much stuff there as you can. It was helpful not needing to transport 200+ mason jars from Ohio to Texas, then back to Ohio. Also, buy things online and send them to your “home” address or contact person. I sent my mom so many things directly from vendors/websites so I wouldn’t have the opportunity to forget them on the trip home for the wedding!!

So in closing Brides – while it’s stressful planning a wedding out of state, it’s definitely do able.  Make your lists, ask for help, keep in touch with your vendors and you’re all set.  Don’t fall behind on your tasks and everything will out of fine.  Today.com has a great article that may also be helpful!

As a wedding vendor myself, I suggest being up front right away with your vendors that you’re out of state so they can make a note that a lot of corresponding will be through email or phone instead of in person.

I hope you find this blog post not only helpful but also encouraging that you’re not along in your wedding planning process while you’re hours or states away.

A BIG THANK YOU to my Brides who took time to answer some questions and the reason why Brides-to-be who are planning a wedding out of state know there’s light at the end of the tunnel!

If found the post helpful, be sure to check out other posts for brides by click here